‘Letting go creates possibilities’ is the theme that has impacted me through 2017 and into 2018.
Vulnerability to experiences of powerlessness and the courage to risk have shifted my mental models and impacted my sense of myself and how I am in the world.
The truth is that if I had a choice I would not opt for any of these experiences. Indeed, such is the nature of living. In some circumstances we are privileged and empowered to choose a new path and in others ‘it happens’. We are faced with choices of how to live in the moment.
Experiencing the impact of illness, suffering and death over the last year has perturbed me. I have been jolted back to my core. Letting go of what I previously saw as important: control, expertise, being correct; allowed the space to embrace the my core values of compassion, empathy, community, family, self-care and openness.
My metaphor has shifted from ‘breaking through a wall one brick at a time’ to ‘stepping off a cliff’.
Breaking through a wall is an orderly, analytical process; stepping off a cliff is an act of trust and confidence that whatever I find ‘down there’ will be okay, possibly even excellent!
Letting go implies change. I have begun to appreciate more fully that choosing to ‘hold on’ limits possibilities and makes change more difficult. My holding on to the belief that ‘good people do not get cancer and die’ increased the pain of grief of the experience.
Feelings of anger and fear towards cancer are about feeling powerless over something that I do not understand and cannot change. Paradoxically letting go of the need to understand and change has allowed me to deepen my awareness of others’ suffering, the value of community, and an appreciation of being present to the moment.
Letting go of how I believe the world, life and others ‘should be’ has opened me to awareness and acceptance of how the world, life and others ‘are’. This is about acceptance of others and myself.
Stepping off the cliff is about going deeper, into a new place that creates new awareness, compassion and opportunities to serve; values that are core to me.
Movement towards the core implies being courageous, trusting and open to possibilities. It does not always need to be about the life changing and profound.
However, even the slightest movement can have an unexpected impact!
Coaching can be about approaching the possible within a safe and curious relationship. Trusting my coach to hold our time and space as a sacred opportunity to explore myself as a living and changing person in the moment. This gift allows me the opportunity to let go of current ways of thinking and to welcome new awareness that generates new possibilities. Over time this process becomes deeper and more centered on my core way of being in the world.
I welcome your thoughts and questions:
What are you holding on to that could be limiting your possibilities?
What beliefs about others harm your sense of wellbeing?
When you do let go of a limiting belief what possibilities emerge?
Explore the Possibilities
t. 902.221.5864 e. brian.duggan@marathonhrcg.com